Interest or Desire? Just because some one is smoking hot, and constantly putting it on display, doesn't mean they are someone you would want.  I spent time in the military, lived with a bunch of guys, shower, eat, sleep, and work.  There was one that I am told was the "most gorgeous man on earth" by more than one person.  He has the personality of a brick, and was about as bright. Would I watch a video of him getting down with another guy, Yes.  Would I want to be the guy, NO. For the original poster, I am guessing that none of these guys see you as anything more than a friend, and more likely just another team player, and that is the reason you show interest, but not desire.

Go for it!

I know this thread is kinda old but someone else refreshed it and that's why I noticed it.  I thought I would add a reply because when I was 14 I was in the same kind of situation but I was the teenager in question! Basically my dad (who I've only ever met about 7 times in my life) forced my outing as he discovered my browsing history and told my mum who in turn told all my siblings and friends… I was mortified and very scared, I lost my best friend because of this (turns out she hated gays so probably for the best! :D). I actually ran away from home for several weeks but that's another story! Anyway when I finally came back home, one day I was in my room and my older cousin walks in, apparently my mum wanted him to have a chat with me about being gay. It was one of the most awkward moments of my life. He basically said "yeah so hi, I'm your cousin and I'm gay and your mum wanted me to talk to you. I don't really know what to say so I'm just going to stand here for 10 minutes then leave. Do you have any questions?".. I replied something like "Nope". We ended up just chatting about the usual small stuff people do then he left. As a kid I must have been thinking something like "what the fuck was my mum thinking" "that was so embarrassing" "like they haven't already told enough people"... "When I'm ready I will talk about it myself". So I guess it did feel like invasion of privacy. It's quite hard to think back and try to remember how you felt as a teenager in such scenarios. Here's an extra little story some might find amusing. I have 3 sisters and 1 brother. 1 of my sisters lived away from home and it turned out everyone forgot to tell her I was gay/came out. One day she phones me up to see how I am and I was like "I'm fine, I went out clubbing last night, slept with this guy I met bla bla.. other gay club talk". She says "Wait.. what? You're GAY?!". I said "I thought you knew, I thought everyone knew, didn't they tell you?" She said "No, no one's told me anything". At this point I was stammering and stressing and really worried... she could tell and quickly replied "Don't worry I don't mind, I've known you was gay ever since you was about 3 years old". lol phew  :hug: I'd be interested to know how it went for you and your cousin. Hopefully he'll have a better experience than I did!

Same here! ehhe i love being bi so many options and new ways of looking through sexuality! support os essential 

next time say "I'm sure she's a great girl but no thank you, I'm not interested" you don't owe them any bigger explanation than that, it's not rude to say no. Incidently, you don't have to "come out" with the rainbow flags and gold hotpants to be honest about who you are - not coming out and being in the closet are two VERY different things. being in the closet sucks and leads to uncomfortable situations like this (I remember them well from my Uni days) but being honest about who you are doesn't mean everyone has to know your business. think about it.

well this is not incest but well i did suck and kissed some cleaning-staff dudes at work with the risk of being caught  ;D

There's no right way to do it. The only person in my family who knows is my mother, and I have about 3 friends that know. I think really you just tell people that you trust and on a need-to-know basis. Don't try to tell everyone at once.

@antstorm: where are you .. I guess: [image: india.gif] :afr:

bhè un figlio a quell'età…però nn soffrirà certamente la fame ,quando lui nn ci sarà più

Another Valentine day thinking about him! :cry2: :cry2: :cry2: :cry2: :cry2: :cry2: :cry2: :cry2:

I don't think asking someone if they are gay is the best way?  It is possible they are a closet case.  I know someone that is married to a woman and seems to be extremely charismatic with the ladies but acts extremely tongue tied or says awkward things when he talks to me.  He has trouble looking me in the eye when we are talking.

what a great year for you!!! Good luck and i know it would be a great moment meeting your supportive dad!

That is absolutely awesome!

I would go on watching some gay porn thing

Unless you're planning to go back to China, you shouldn't give a damn about everyone else's opinion. If you're parents don't accept you the way you are, then it's their loss. Otherwise, lying for years can really annoy you.

@pkfegroup: Here's the thing.  The best pieces of advice that I can give you are: First - You can't change his family or how he feels about his family.  If his mom wants to get back in touch, then she knows how to dial a phone or write a letter/email/whatever.  If she is doing it through his sister/her daughter, then she isn't really ready.  It is a good sign that she's evolving on the issue.  And your bf will do what he needs to do for his own sanity. Second - You can sit down and tell your bf how you feel.  (a) that you are mindful that you lost your dad and it had an emotional impact on you; and (b) you support him in whatever he decides is best; and you won't bring it up again or nag him. She doesn't have his number since they haven't spoken in so long, nor an address of any sort.