How old were you

obsidian14

24 when I first came out to my (straight guy) best friend. That was the hardest one to do, I was literally crying the entire time because I was so scared. He turned out to be quite supportive, though I had to reassure him that being gay doesn't mean I'm gonna start wearing dresses or get a sex change. LOL I was still the same guy.

And it felt really good. Like a huge weight I didn't even know I was carrying had lifted. No joke, I felt like skipping and singing afterwards. All because finally, someone else knew I was gay. To this day, it still counts as one of the happiest days of my life. Which was good too, because I was spiraling into really deep and really dark depression by then. Joining internet forums helped me get the courage to come out.

Then I started coming out to the rest of my closest circle of friends (all straight guys, around 14 of them). All of them were either supportive or didn't care at all (which was great). Then I started coming out to female friends (three so far). I'm at the point where I don't really care if a random stranger knows I'm gay.

But here I am. I'm turning 36, and I still haven't come out to family. My dad died before I could tell him. Though I think he suspected and didn't particularly care. I haven't told my mom or any of my siblings. They're not conservative or anything. Not particularly liberal either. Just in the middle, like most Catholics. My parents and my older sisters don't make fun of gay people, they treat them with respect and all, but there's still a slight disapproval. And they still regularly ask me when I'm getting a girlfriend or getting married.

My brother probably suspects, but he's never confronted me about it. And he's a millennial like me, so he's alright. He's not homophobic in the slightest and has gay friends. Funnily enough, I'm pretty sure my younger sister is either lesbian or bisexual, and she hasn't come out either.

I think I'm still waiting for a partner. Like I'll only come out to people when I need to. I wish I could, but I'd rather not go through the inevitable family drama without someone close to support me through it.

At least that's what I tell myself. I'm still waiting for the day when I can fully be out though.

msl4xxl

To myself? 11. To others, 17. I'm now 54. God it's been great!

fizra77

18 и до сих пор

lerrom

20 years old and 1 day..

Bigteisti

I was around 18 y.o.

jakubhtpc

I am 42 and my coming out was in my 20s

thegrimmy

I came out at age 13 or 14. I was lucky to feel safe enough to do so, because compared to my peers then, I came out pretty early.

MrMazda

I was about 14 when I finally came out. I am fortunate though, as neither my parents, nor any of by siblings batted an eye when I came out. It was as though nothing had changed.

In fact, my sister even said "Yo ya freak... Ya got any actual news?" This was the most perfect thing she could have said because she's always called me a freak, so it was like nothing had changed.

acrisal

35, I have been dismissed and discriminated after that.

teratophile

I first expressed the idea at around 11-ish but didn't really have the proper words. Both parents had pieced things together fully at 13 or 15. Still not fully out as of now, haha.

Watever2000

Was around 13 when I found out shit was different with me, came out at 18.

storemyshit

I was maybe 12 when I had feelings for other boys. I don't know that I recognized those feelings as sexual for another couple years. Growing up in the rural south of the US I had zero exposure or information on sexuality (aside from friends misinformation and a few magazines) much less gay sexuality. I recall seeing drag queens on tv for a gay event as a teen and thinking that wasn't me. Again, that attitude was a vestige of being raised in a conservative area that demonized other and was openly racist, sexist and homophobic. By the time I was 16, I knew exactly what I was and was starting to understand that: I wasn't alone, it was likely just an uncommon expression of nature, and it was a crappy unfair situation to be in. A counselor was the first person I came out to that year. Lucky for me they were cool. I told my family in the next year or two. By that time I had GTFO and moved to a big city 1200 miles north. I was quite angry about all this for many years, which was my coping mechanism. Eventually I got tired of being angry and chilled out. I hope anyone else who has experienced violence and/or oppression over sexuality can make the connections between their experiences and those of other oppressed peoples. It mystifies me that gay Republicans exist.

bleepxorz

I was 27.

HolidayInn

I never really came out to my family. Never had "the talk" with them. I was just me, and lived with my "roommate" for so long and they put 2 and 2 together.

danvio

I was 13 and my mom started laughing saying she knew since I was little.
I mean, crying a whole year that you hate soccer and wanna sign up for ballet instead at 7-8 years old is kinda a hard giveaway and then there was also my tomboy lesbian sister who was more butch than I, so it was hard to seem masculine next to that. Lol

And this reminds me it's my 21st coming-out anniversary, it's weird to think it has been that long.

I will say I was super lucky to have a super liberal and progressive mom, who basically became the LGBTQ ambassador in my hometown and is like the biggest faghag I know. (Thankfully not with me, she has a whole bunch of her own gay friends...)
I feel for people who are in the opposite position, but that's also why I have always offered my support to people coming out.

AcerianRenus

Didn't come out until I had my first gay kiss because I didn't see the point lol

Thebigmattb

I was 16, and it was more exploded out... my dad found my porn stash lol

parcelhuse

I knew when i was very, very young. Basically from the first time i saw a big dick. Came out in my early twenties

Ledbear

I was 40, and my partner had cancer, so we cut the crap, as we knew the most important thing was we bring together through that hard time. He didn´t make it, sadly.

Rexplosion

I was 24