Where did you find your gay friends?
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Don't have any
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I have a few, some I meet in school or friend with benefits I met through grindr. They're far from my closest friends though. I have a few best friends, straight girls, who I've known since forever. But I'm kind of a loner, so I am fine with it, but it would be nice to have a few more. I'm so bad at mainting new friendships though, since I enjoy spending time alone so much. Ah well.
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I don't wish to speak ill of "my own kind" so I'll just keep it simple and say that gay guys tend to have other interests and priorities than me so.. aside from two or three ex boyfriends that I still keep in touch with, I only have straight friends.
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OP:
In high-school I was usually wanted to date some gay guy I met, but after my first boyfriend and I split up we stayed friends for… coming up on a decade this September.
I'm the president at my LGBT Pride club at the community college, and I have no interest in sleeping with ANY of my club members. (that's not the point of pride club, it seems inappropriate for me to be a representative of the only active LGBT organisation in my city and be sleeping with the constituents.) But they are my friends, and sometimes, better than family.
Honestly I don't go out of my way to make gay friends. Mostly because I don't care much about anyone's orientation, but also because I seemingly have less in common with the gay people I meet in passing, and have severely different communication styles. This makes having a rewarding friendship more difficult. Just off the top of my head, recently I met some gay guys that listened to a lot of pop music, and liked to go out to the clubs and dance... I don't like any of those things. They are not enjoyable to me. But I FEEL like a minority within a minority saying that.
Then again you won't see me at any gym either (maybe that's another place you can look for gay friends) IDK I'm clearly bad at this.
I've made the same experiences as you, except for the staying-friends-with-ex-BFs. And I, too, feel like a minority within a minority. Usually it's not a big deal. But if one needs to talk to someone who can understand one's "gay problems", straight friends are often just… incompatible.
![😕](https://community.gaytor.rent/assets/plugins/nodebb-plugin-emoji/emoji/apple/1f615.png?v=57695cee877 ":-\")
OP: I met some at my university's gay pride club, but due to the lack of mutual interests and people moving to other countries, those acquaintances and friendships rarely last in my case. But that's okay, since you'll alway find someone you get warm with, in a plactonic sense :hug:.
Also, at least here in Germany, it seems that our local hacker spaces have much higher than usual share in openly gay people. I have some ideas why that might be, but I'm still not sure why.
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Ppl who are not into bar/club/disco scene are not easy to find gay friends. I tried some website like "meetup", wasn't lucky.
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Honestly, Jackd. LGBTQ based activities are a good way to meet platonic friends as well
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Also, at least here in Germany, it seems that our local hacker spaces have much higher than usual share in openly gay people. I have some ideas why that might be, but I'm still not sure why.
What are your ideas? I'm curious?
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in GYM forsure ;D
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i fund my first friend in gaybar !
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and also i fund the another gay friend in my language institute
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alot were hook ups, that turned into friends
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I might want to add that I met my best friend in a dating site. We started seeing each other for sex, but never really developed into a serious relationship. We got really found of eachother nevertheless, and it's been about 4 years since the last time we had sex, but we still talk pretty much everyday and hangout every week.
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Platonic gay friends, in highschool, college and now in my work
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A public park at night.
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Internet!
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I like that this topic has some good ideas. Thanks. Keep it relevant for all minorities of minorities.
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always in the app…...talk first,and pick someone to meet in real life
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I kind of have the same problem. I just don't see the idea of getting friends just because they are gay. I have my straight friends and I'm very proud of them. On the other hand the guy I'm meeting right now has like ONLY gay friends and some of them really attractive. So it's kind of weird… I only know gays from dating apps for example if the date didn't work out and we just became friends or from SCRUFF then those are international friends mostly US or GB and they are some great people but it's sad that you can't even go out for a drink cause someone's from another country and you'll probably won't even meet.
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Few of them actually greeted me first in Grindr and after chatting for some time, we became friends. We didn't immediately hang out together though, it took a couple of times first, while I met some other few in facebook.
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Most of my gay friends were friends I made even before finding out they were gay. Usually connected to activities I like to do or events I like to attend.
I met some at book launches and others by striking up a conversation at the local swimming pool. I don't like going to bars much, but I imagine that would also be a good place to find some friends- a karaoke bar would be best. You can sing and make friends while bonding over how good/terrible you were.
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