Out At The New York Times:

[agis]

Ok there's a say in Italian which, translated, could sound like

The time is a gentleman  

Since after all 20 years have passed since then I would be curious about an opinion of yours bears. T'was an American affair after all

[leatherbear]

:hmmm: Well, agis, I actually lived a very different life in the early 80's thru the 90's. A life that revolved around HIV/AIDS and the perilous times created by this new scourge on society. I will tell only a very little of it for fear of revealing too many details that would make it easy for someone to track me down and know more than I am willing to share in this virtual world that allows me some anonymity today.

In 1981 I lived in Atlanta, Ga. and was the typical Gay Man of the times. Unless a person was alive and lived in these days you can not grasp what this means. Looking back on those days brings fond memories of a wild lifestyle indeed that I am amazed to have survived at all. I never lived in any one city for very long in those days ~ I would relocate at the drop of a hat ~ because there was so much of the world left to discover and experience. I never had a partner in these days and lived a single and free lifestyle that involved many, many sexual partners and were mostly 1 night stands. My lifestyle included Bath Houses, Back Room Bars, and any other activity that would end up in a sexual encounter/s. Often times many sexual encounters a day. I had visited Florida many times and got the fever to move again so started making plans for relocating to Florida. My very last night out in Atlanta I attended a Fund Raising Event for a bartender at one of my favorite bars ~ Bulldog's. This bartender had "Gay Cancer" which was something none of us had ever heard of at the time. Yes there were news articles at the time but they never contained any useful information ~ just that there was a new health crisis for a very few Gay Men and most of them were in California and it was deadly and moved quickly to debilitate those with the "Cancer".

I moved to Florida and almost from day 1 started "Dating" 1 man ~ a rather new experience for me frankly. I fell in love and we moved in together, however, he was younger than I by 8 years. He had virtually no experience and I had too much experience so we decided to have an open relationship. I felt I had so much to show and teach him about being Gay and frankly never thought the relationship would last because of this difference in experiences. We did eventually split but it lasted 16 1/2 years. Anyhow, very little changed in my lifestyle except I had a partner now that I shared life with.

In 1983 I was feeling lousy in general and went to my Dr. several times in 1 week. (My Dr. was Gay) I did not have specific complaints at the time. All I knew was I felt horrible 24/7 with no specific symptoms. On my last visit to the Dr he told me I was a hypochondriac and we fought openly and loudly at his check out desk. Just before I stormed out of his office he had his nurse take a urine sample ~ I almost refused this test but gave the sample and left vowing never to return to his office. Before I got home the Dr called my partner and told him they found blood in my urine and that I should return to his office even if it was after he closed for the day. I called the Dr and told him I would never return to his office and he suggested I go to the Emergency Room ASAP.

Off to ER then. I told them my "story" they put me in a room and I swear they forgot I was there. Hours later I had to urinate so I called the Nurse and found the bathroom. My urine was Coca Cola brown ~ I nearly fainted with shock ~ so I called the Nurse to show it to her. This is when things kicked into overdrive. Within seconds I was back in the room and under Quarantine. With in minutes the ER Dr finally showed up and started asking me questions that seemed odd and totally unrelated to any medical condition. After the 3rd question ( they had 10 questions developed to help Dr's determine if the patient was a "GRIDS" candidate ) I knew he was after whether I was Gay or not. So I asked him "Are you asking me if I am a Faggot?". You should have seen his face!! Before he could respond I told him that yes I was a Faggot and my boyfriend was in the waiting room. He muttered something and left the room.

The Nurse came back and told me I had Hepatitis, what that meant, and what would happen now. I was admitted and still under Quarantine, treated for Hepatitis A immediately. Normally in 24 - 48 hours patients are sent home. 48 hours after admission I received some flowers and plants from work and family ~ quite a few in fact ~ and the Pink Lady just came in the room without the Quarantine Garb that everyone one else was wearing when they came in the room. BTW: no visitors allowed at this point. Well, the Nurses went crazy because she did not Garb up before the delivery of the plants and flowers. The little old Pink Lady was terrorized literally by the Nurses. She was immediately admitted to the Hospital for "observation" and Hepatitis A treatment as well. I was in shock and this is when I started to realize something else was going on with me and this Quarantine. I asked to see the Head Nurse for the Floor to get some answers to my new questions. She came but refused to answer any questions and told me I had to ask the Dr these questions and that he would be in for rounds later that afternoon. I was angry but agreed to wait the few hours to see the Dr.

At this point I looked at the cards attached to the plants and flowers delivered and some of the plants were for a man that was supposed to be in the other Hospital bed according to Hospital records. Of course with the Quarantine he was not in that bed so I called the Nurse's Station and informed them of the mistake made with the plant delivery. The plants quickly became mine because they could not be taken out of my room due to the Quarantine.

When the Dr arrived later that day he told me that I would normally have been released already let alone still under Quarantine. I was being held pending the results of the HIV test he had ordered. Explained that it took 5-7 days and that in my best interest ( medically ) I would remain under Quarantine with no visitors allowed.

I lost it totally at this point and I mean totally lost it. The Dr's solution for me at this point was to call the Hospital Chaplain in to counsel me. This man was a Saint truly. He managed to talk me down and be content with the facts as they were at that point and wait for the HIV test results. The Chaplain promised to be there for me at any time and gave me his home phone # and others where I could reach him 24/7 and he came to see me several times a day as well. I spent 2 more days in this mental miasma waiting for test results.

I woke up the 6th day a totally changed man. I called the Hospital Administrator and told him I was going home immediately and that they should start whatever they intended to do to stop me from leaving. Within a few minutes my room was filled with Hospital Staff including the Chaplain begging me to reconsider leaving. I told them again I was leaving they should do whatever it was they intended to do to stop me and I called the Police Dept in front of them and informed the Police of my intentions to just go home and die ~ after all everyone everyone else was dieing or dead. The Police came and the Hospital had to admit they had no reason to Medically hold me but it was again "In my best interest" to not leave the Hospital without the test results.

I called my BF ad told him to come and get me now!! Before he could get to the Hospital the Dr. came in the room and told me had just gotten off the phone with the lab and my results were I was HIV negative and it was all over with I could go home.

I went off on the entire room full of Hospital Staff and told them exactly what I thought of the entire situation. I promised legal and public actions against the Hospital and all the Staff involved.They immediately left the room except the Chaplain. He stayed with me till my BF arrived and spent hours talking to us both before I finally left the Hospital. As I said the man was a Saint for me at that time.

The last thing I said to the Chaplain was "No one, Gay or Straight, deserved to go thru what I went thru during those 6 days" and that I intended to see that it if I had my way it would not happen again to anyone as long as I lived. He then told me about a group of medical and pastoral folks that were trying to start a support group for HIV/AIDS and invited me to their next meeting in 3 days. He explained that this group had no Gay members and that they had no idea how to approach the Gay Community with this concept of a Local support group.

I never pursued any legal action against the Hospital or Staff.

Thus began my Radical Gay Activism phase of life. It lasted for many years and took me many places that I would never have dared to think of going and doing. I even worked on a Committee at the Hospital to improve patient relations and procedures and even gave continuing education hours to the same Staff that I had hated so badly. To say much more would be bragging perhaps but I did what was needed regardless of what it took to get the job done. I worked in the trenches when there was little hope for patients and saw far too much loss for one lifetime.

I am still a Gay Activist to this day tho the role has changed and I am less Radical unless pushed to become Radical.

We have come a long way since those days and yet we still have far to go and much work remains to be done.

I posted this article lest we forget where we were, where we are today and where we need to be in the future.


I hope I did not take this  :ot:

[agis]

Oooooooh my gaaaawd…. I hope I did not take that off topic? These are instead the bears I'd like to see  :blind: ahem more often.
No, because you know bears, it is hard to believe, but even in my little country we have a place named "Parco Nazionale d'Abruzzo" where it is still possible to enjoy some free and wild bears  :cheesy2:. Always better than the caged in the zoos ones trust me.  So your story was, at least for me,
very nice and agreeable thank you  :hug2:.  Of course I didn't expect this  pleasant surprise and, if I had to answer to everything, I would run the risk of getting a little "fluvial" 
Forgive me then if I get only this passage which is the one I expected someway.

I am still a Gay Activist to this day tho the role has changed and I am less Radical unless pushed to become Radical.
We have come a long way since those days and yet we still have far to go and much work remains to be done.
I posted this article lest we forget where we were, where we are today and where we need to be in the future.

Step by step. Why are you less radical? Personally the more I grow old the more I  feel radical. But I see you have used a capital R. Not really  sure what we are speaking about

[leatherbear]

I am less radical today because there are now a political avenues open to LGBT people that did not exist in those days

[agis]

Yes the term radical might be seen as polysemantic. There are political parties which have chosen to name themselves "Radical" in Europe that are not necessarily and exactly the same thing in the different nations. The Italian version has been traditionally a pro gay party since the times I remember of it.
Anyway, since I'm not aware of the existence of an American Radical Party, if we had to use this term in itself without comitting it to anything else, it seems to me the term radical stems from the latin radix meaning root and metaphorically origin, beginning, foundation. If one so was less radical than before, we could think she/he has given up with the search of the foundations cause she/he thinks that someone else is up to go on with the same task. Right?  

[leatherbear]

If one so was less radical than before, we could think she/he has given up with the search of the foundations cause she/he thinks that someone else is up to go on with the same task. Right?

I guess the answer for this is Yes. However, this sounds a bit like "giving up" the fight. I have not given up the fight just changed the way I fight now.

I just no longer have to risk arrest to get the attention needed to address an issue. I spent many days and nights working with Groups that met in secret to plan attacks of various sorts ~ sometimes very public attacks others not so public. But the times called for a more radical approach to issues that were not and would never have been addressed without the radical approach. The political environment has changed and today there are many organizations leading the fight on addressing issues that I support in their efforts to gain political attention necessary to create change.

I guess all I have done is moved from the Front Line of the fight into a more supportive position but the fight continues and will for some time before we reach LGBT equality.

[agis]

@leatherbear:

If one so was less radical than before, we could think she/he has given up with the search of the foundations cause she/he thinks that someone else is up to go on with the same task. Right?

I guess the answer for this is Yes. However, this sounds a bit like "giving up" the fight. I have not given up the fight just changed the way I fight now.

I just no longer have to risk arrest to get the attention needed to address an issue. I spent many days and nights working with Groups that met in secret to plan attacks of various sorts ~ sometimes very public attacks others not so public. But the times called for a more radical approach to issues that were not and would never have been addressed without the radical approach. The political environment has changed and today there are many organizations leading the fight on addressing issues that I support in their efforts to gain political attention necessary to create change.

I guess all I have done is moved from the Front Line of the fight into a more supportive position but the fight continues and will for some time before we reach LGBT equality.

Ok. No because you know bears… seen from outside, Obama's position seems rather ambiguous. Actually in Italy we have politicians like Niki Vendola and Luxuria who are  overtly LGBT and have been elected as such. Even if I'm G like Niki I feel, politically speaking, quite closer to Luxuria who is T.
But of course, at this point, for my comprehension, the quesion should be: is/could it be actually possible accordin to u for a outtathecloset transexual like Luxuria to to be elected to the Congress in the USA as such?

[leatherbear]

We are just beginning to get openly Gay and Lesbian candidates elected ~ IMHO no Transgender person could get elected at this time. Part of the work yet to done to achieve some measure of Sexual Orientation acceptance and Equality here in the USA.

[agis]

Ok mebbe it is still too early then to consider more advanced kinds of conceptions. Luxuria and Niki too are after all exceptions in a world that could and can still easily revoke these scarce and fragile conquests. Only if you look at a wider historical perspective we could better appreciate the  improvements. Dunno if you had already read this  uni paper which is in the public domain, has 36 years but has still made a very interesting reading for me :).

hxxp://digitalcommons.unl.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1061&context=englishfacpubs

[leatherbear]

:afr: At least we do not have to live under these kind of laws anymore  :cheers: