Would you date with someone who isnt out?

alfie4030

yessssss

tatsuya57

I think "no" because it would be like an inability of being myself in public. Lying to his family and friends would be like returning to the closet :-[ But actually, you never know what can happen in the future…so maybe

acakbenak

I'm out and I have dated some closeted and outed guys.

Each has its own perks, I think. Living in a country where public display of affection is frowned upon, even for straight couples, and where homosexuality is considered a disease or mental disorder, it does not make quite a difference between the two.

It is indeed felt nice when my partner introduced me as his partner. I feel… acknowledged.
But it is also feel nice when I am introduced as a mere friend or cousin, because I don't think people need to know our personal life.

I am currently in a relationship with a closeted guy, and I enjoy it. We only come out as partners to a select few, those we actually care about and care about us. I did introduce him to my family, and he did promise me to do the same when he is ready.

I would not push him, tho. It took my parents three years from kicking me out of the house when I came out to start calling me again and welcome me home. It took them five more years to be willing to meet my partner at that time without showing their disappointment or even disgusted feeling they might have.

So, I'll let my current partner to take his time, even though it will take forever.

But then again, everyone will have different opinions and takes on this matter. As long as we are all happy with our choices, and understand the consequences, of course.

Love,
AB.

unknown69

Maybe, depends how deep they are in the closet and only for the one night stand, or a fuck buddy. I would never start a relationship with a closet case. They are horrible boyfriends and you effectively become a toy who is only pulled out of the closet when they feel so. It's obvious that holding hands in public is a no with such guys, but it doesn't stop there, they will also alienate you in front of the people they know. Closetted guys are never relaxed and comfortable around you, unless you are alone with them. They can suck life out of you as well and even pull you back in the closet.

oqoqoq

I would say yes if it was a short term thing. Harmless fun? Sure. But if we saw each other being together long term, unless it was a case of safety, I'd much much much prefer us both being "out".

humandoormat

not cool

agogpry

For me it wouldn't be a problem

Eridanos

I wouldn't mind. It might add some guilty thrill to the thing…

As long as the dude isn't married and/or with kids. (That is very dangerous territory since your actions affect other people besides yourselves)

But honestly, for a long time commitment I'd rather be with someone who is out (at least to family and friends)

poltergeist

As long as he is good natured. And also single, although this may be troublesome in a long term

raving885

I am right now and when he decided to come out to his parents I was there to support him. It is not easy to come out and me and him have had these discussions before hand, so he was ready to come out to his parents and be loved by everyone

blankspace

Yes, if you like the guy why not?

JACK777

I would because where I'm from gay people face persecution all the time.

spam17

@Eridanos:

I wouldn't mind. It might add some guilty thrill to the thing…

As long as the dude isn't married and/or with kids. (That is very dangerous territory since your actions affect other people besides yourselves)

But honestly, for a long time commitment I'd rather be with someone who is out (at least to family and friends)

Kids involment hardens the whole situation..

:afr: