Fat people going to the Gym

obras62

I am well over weight, therefore, I'm insecure about joining a gym in order to try and get in shape and loose weight.
being fat, I have no stamina and completely out of shape. the very basics of body workout is quite hard for me to do.
I feel ashamed working out in front of other fit guys, and also take a private trainer thinking he might not take me seriously.
I'm interested in your opinion / reaction (to yourself) when you see a fat guy at the gym.
will you encourage him in your heart to keep going or will you think he is out of place?

You have a lot of good ideas here and opinions, I'll give you mine as well.

I am overweight and I have to lose, at least for now, 45 pounds so that I can have a procedure done on my heart (it's a great incentive).
It is difficult to get motivated. I too feel out of place and ashamed, however, I and you show be praised for at least trying.
The idea is to not overdo anything.
MyFitnessPal is a free app for a smartphone.
Download it, and use it in tandem with MapMyFitness
This helps you log your food and exercises.
The idea is to go slowly, you didn't get big overnight and you won't get fit overnight.

Start out with the basics, like getting to the gym, cardio and some weights.
With time you will do more and want to do more.

I teach English as a foreign language and I tell my students the same thing, stop trying to do it all in one day. A little each day then you get into a routine and then you will be happier and fitter.

Good luck
and stop looking in the mirror and hating yourself.

Monastero85

Before joining the gym I had zero muscles, so I was feeling ashamed of doing the exercizes ladies do, lift their weight, and seeing people with huge muscles lifting up real weights.
But then there were also "fat" guys, and they helped me a lot in understanding that not everyone who goes to the gym is already fit! But with hard work, you can definitely get better.
I have been going to the gym about twice a week for the last 2 years, and I can totally see improvements in my body and in the body of the "fat" guys who kept working.

Morover, from my point of view, having a gym subscription forces you to go and do something a lot more than doing that at home, cause you can procrastinate much more at home!!!

Let us know what you decide to do!

rufusmc

As someone who puts on weight as soon as I look at food I know how it feels thinking abut going to a gym.

I joined weight watchers with some mates and lost 54lbs in 5 months just by eating right, the weight has pretty much stayed off (except over the hols!). I have a fairly active life with loads of walking etc so that was my exercise. I don't have masses of muscle as I'm not into weight lifting.

So if you want to lose some weight try one of the weight loss programs, even if you join, get the details and then do it yourself, the gym can come at a later stage when you feel more comfortable.

Good luck whatever you decide to do :hug2:

ffuck

Personally I wouldn't have any problem seeing someone fat in the gym. I would even be proud of them and willing to help if they asked.
And this is how it is most of the time, contrary to popular belief. Especially among guys, there is no bullying or something like that, there is in fact support and motivation. I think the worst you can get is people not paying attention to you at all, everyone minding their own business (which is actually what all people should do at the gym). Focus on yourself and what you have to do, don't get interrupted by others around you, and if you need help, just ask: gym-rats may seem intimidating sometimes but many of them are pretty nice people

Good luck, friend! And keep your head up no matter what! :laugh: :laugh:

dzirlo

don't let your (ridiculous) fear of being ridiculed keep you from going where you think you should be.
if there really are some self-absorbed idiots in the gym who would even look at you cross for how ever you look, remember they are the idiots, not you.

i had that same fear throughout my middle and high school and started going to the gym pretty much late, and i'm so sorry for all the time i've lost just cause of my inability to confront my fears.
now i don't have that body i could've had if i had started in my formative years.

i think many of you telling the guy to avoid the gym are actually enabling his fear. you should confront it, and don't forget, you are soon going to look better and better, and your self-image will change also.

unfortunately, we are all aware that in the gay world, good body is almost a compulsory requirement.
not just for sex, even your social status depends on it.
so, just go with it, and never give up on self-improvement cause of a few mean glances from some nobodys.

Domosuke

@dzirlo:

i think many of you telling the guy to avoid the gym are actually enabling his fear. you should confront it, and don't forget, you are soon going to look better and better, and your self-image will change also.

unfortunately, we are all aware that in the gay world, good body is almost a compulsory requirement.
not just for sex, even your social status depends on it.

I think as long as a guy can walk up stairs without any issues, makes a conscious effort to eat healthy now and then. Still keeps active like jogging after work or bike riding etc, power walking etc. lol.

I don't think he needs to go a gym and become the next Mr. Olympia, not that there is anything wrong with that.

It's clear he's not comfortable going to a gym right now, so I'm not gonna force him to go.

Some people are big, some people are small, some people are both during different stages in their life. That's just the way it is.

I'm not saying people should be obese and underweight, no. I'm just saying people have different shapes and sizes.

Yeah in the gay community, physical attractiveness is key and advised, but you kinda just contradicted yourself.

You told him to ignore people that shame his body, yet at the same time said in order to be happy in the gay community, he needs to lose weight?

Kekkaishi

Thank you all for your posts!

even though I will not be going to the gym after all, I have began a "40 minutes full body workout" video to which I only lasted 20 minutes or so. with time I will get better at this and perhaps start going to the gym.

brianboru72

Good for you! We all have to begin somewhere and you're off to a good start with that kind of attitude.
The key is keeping yourself motivated. Consistency is so important. 10 minutes that you can keep doing regularly is more important and will help you more than forcing 40 minutes and then giving up after a week.
Once you feel up for it- visit the gym and try to see a trainer for some advice, even just for when you get started.

samiderwish

u want to make balance betwen the eating and sporting

dist

When I first started working out I was super skinny and did sometimes feel inadequate working out next to big muscular guys. But as time went by I got into my routine and just didnt mind what other people were doing or how they look. And heres a secret: they dont either. Everyone is there to better themselves, no matter their current state of mind. Now when I see new beginners I root for them and I respect them for pushing themselves, because everyone started out that way, so everyone understands.

And I would advice you, especially as a gay man or whatever you are, to not let your insecurities and fears dictate the way you live your life. Dont hide away, get out there and face everything you fear, thats how I built my confidence and Im sure it will help you too. Go to the gym, do your best, dont mind other people because they dont mind you. And if you want to, ask them for advice. All guys Ive talked to at the gym, fit or not, are more than happy to share their tips. Have some faith in people. Especially gym rats. They may look fierce and determined during their workouts, but when you talk to them, theyre just like any other decent human beings

kaworun83

Hi there,
what do you mean by well over weight?

i am a bit over weight, and started with some minor changes in my daily routine: instead of using bus i switched to riding bike, and walking some routes. i avoid lifts and take stairs if possible and not too much storeys to take. and i traded some netflix time with a walk.
my diet contains less beef, and starchy carbs (bread, pasta, rice, potatoes) but more low-fat-chicken or turkey and vegetables.
oh, i also banned butter and sugar: i switched from coke to tap water and tea (earl grey; hot) . [no more caramel frappucinos]
after a month my weight started slowly to decrease. shape and stamina will come hopefully after a shitload of patience and discipline

i considered myself as too fat, i am on my way to a tolerable level, but there is still a way to go, please believe me, i can understand your fear.
oh and you feeling ashamed is just in your head, and trust me, the guy working out in front / beside you can not read what is happening in your head. your mind is not a open book where everyone can come and read as one pleases.
for a financial motivation, get a membership. you will use it, if you make yourself aware of the fact, that you have paid money for it.

i personally would applaud him in my heart, for he started his first step to change himself. he is at least one step ahead on the journey to better himself than the other guy at home on a coutch with the remote and his netfix account; who deserves shame?

Kekkaishi

Thank you for all your comments. I already mentioned in an earlier post that I had started working out at home about 3 weeks ago - a 40 minute workout for beginners. also, I did not mention it before but a big part of my fear as the communal showers at the gym. i'm ashamed of my naked body even more so. I also read that after a workout you are more likely to get an unwanted erection

kaworun83

may i ask you an intimate question?

what is your progress on weight in the last 30 days?
and
would you tell me (and the community here) your complete nutrition?

Kekkaishi

@kaworun83:

may i ask you an intimate question?

what is your progress on weight in the last 30 days?
and
would you tell me (and the community here) your complete nutrition?

Unfortunately, I have lost only about 2 kg since I started working out. the reason for it is my nutrition

as for my nutrition, i am well aware that i do not eat healthy and since working out i haven't change my nutrition

while i do not eat as much as i want during the day (i am taking into consideration how much i eat) i do however eat snacks and such

also i do not know how to build for myself a nutrition plan that will not cause me to starve.

kaworun83

well, my opinion: healthy eating is a myth ^^
but seriously: you can start by counting how much sugar and fat you consume daily, by eating and drinking. look for these nutrition facts table on the packaging. just keep counting.
if you have collected data for say one week, try to change one or two things to eat next week, but with less sugar/fat. sounds confusing, but, if you look for alternatives and/or substitutes, this may be possible. (and keep collecting data, there might be a pattern to it.)
look at this one as a long term experiment.

Alexxx1

I think you should definitely go.
We tend to be extremely insecure and uncomfortable when in situations like yours, but there are a couple things you should consider:

People usually don't pay too much attention to others. Being at the gym means normally just focusing on your own routine, there's not too much time to watch what other people are doing. Actually, this is a newcomers'' habit, which tends to fade as there's some more iron to pull.
- If, I say IF someone'd look and point an imaginary finger, what would they expect? You are there trying to get rid of your problem, if there's somewhere you should be, it's there! So the stupid one in this situation is this 'imaginary' person
This is the most important: It's excellent that you are exercising, but if you really want to lose weight, diet takes the biggest role. Both for best results.

Natakote

Gym is a place for everyone willing to work on their body. Of course there might be jerks that will make fun of folk that's not in shape but I never noticed it and I don't recall anyone telling me they saw someone being laughed at in the gym while normally working out. Don't feel ashamed of your body and let yourself down man, have courage and motivation to work on it to the results you want to see.

Also, I'd recommend you going on cardio much more as lifting would increase your muscles and not burn much fat which will result in you looking even bigger than you were when you started and that might get you down to quit.

All the best!

shez

Just remember you're not the only one there with self body issues. You'd probably find that the vast majority of people at the gym have or have had their own body confidence issues, that's why they're there, whether that be they were bullied at school for being fat/skinny/lanky/short or as they've got older they've noticed a belly forming or their other half losing interest.

Some of them may have got over it and just got into going to the gym so still do, but they'll remember and won't judge you. They'd probably applaud you for doing something about it.

For the record I'm now 70kg down from around 160 at my peak. It's as much about diet as it is about exercise, you might find that changing your diet kick starts you on your weight loss which gives you more confidence about going to the gym which is the way I did it. The best thing I found to help change my diet was using a food/calorie tracking app… use it religiously and enter everything you eat, I started weighing everything so that I could record it accurately just the process of thinking so much about the food that you're eating and understanding the nutritional value of it all works wonders. Many of the apps also give you meal ideas or diet plans to follow and can track and plan exercise sessions, the one I used was lifesum, but there are several others.

The only slightly embarrassing moment I've had was while changing, a child in the changing room noticed me and was saying to his dad "Dad, Dad, look, that man's got boobs", to be honest the dad sounded more embarrassed than me while he's trying to shut the kid up.

horyna

I lost two-three kilograms by just avoiding frozen pizzas, and a little less chocolate and having a better look at the size of the portions since the New Year. It wouldn't even consider it a diet.

Also watch what you drink. No coke or lemonade, drink water more often.

kaworun83

@kekkaishi: hi woh is it going on? any progress on that workout issue and going to the gym?
and do you consider becoming a rabbit?