If I never come out of closet…
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I am 21 and i came out to almost all of my friends! is liberating! but the family, however is another story :crazy2:
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I'm 19 and recently came out to a handful of my really close friends. Thankfully, they all accepted me openly. I only came out to them because I was going through a lot and felt distant from them. After coming out, as cliche as it is, it felt like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders. I now feel open and less held back knowing they really know who I am. I don't plan to come out to my family anytime soon or at least until I'm financially independent.
If you are happy right now, there's no need to really come out. If you're considering coming out, think about who are more likely to accept and make sure you truly accept yourself for who you are because there's nothing wrong with liking the same gender.
Coming out doesn't mean you change. It just means whoever you're coming out to knows a little more of you.
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Like they say "You're as sick as your secrets"
Keeping stuff bottled up inside is not healthy
But personally I think your sexual orientation is nobody's business.
But if it makes you unhappy It's better to share it with somebody.
They say "A problem shared is a problem half solved"You might be surprised from the outcome
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to be honest I think your sexuality is nobody's business! I'm not out but also I don't see myself " in the closet" I see myself as a private person what's the point of telling people you like dicks
and you already know that some of them ( if not most) will not get it or understand it at all because they aren't in your shoes! I think it's better to just live normally and don't make your happiness depends on others! if you accepted yourself then you're already happy you don't need to share your information to be happy. I tried it once with my straight best friend and told him I'm gay even though he was cool about it but I felt SO ridiculous and I wish I could take it back. nobody needs to know what I'm into really! -
OH SNAP
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@PumpingMuscl If that works for you then great. I agree that it's theoretically no-one's business. However, not putting it out there to the people who know there can cause a chilling effect on personal relationships. In my case coming out was about making it possible to have a healthy relationship with my boyfriend (i.e. not hiding his existence from all my friends and family).
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Do you need to come out to be happy? Yes.
But you won't truly understand that until you've come out.. -
you gotta make sure urself r comfortable for whatever decision you make first
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I think I will do that at least for a long time if not forever. I do not consider coming out until a time comes when the people I know and care about now are no longer with me or close to me. As everyone said, it is different for everyone and you are the only one who is able to properly balance pros and cons.
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You can talk to friends if you are not ready to talk to your family. You can also try to live alone and act as you like. Take care :love:
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…I would never have truly lived.
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This was my biggest fear for quite awhile, not being able to come out and be free. However, once I became financially independent, it was much easier to do so since I had back up incase shit hit the fan.
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All depends on the person you want to be. Can you live a life in secret and lie's and still be happy? Some people can but I have never seen it work long term. All secrets eventually come out.
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It all depends. Is it safe for you to come out? What will the repercussions be if you do come out? Will you get kicked out of your home (if you live with family), will they not support you? If that is the case- maybe when you are financially stable and independent you can come out. In the end, if you lose friends because of your sexual orientation, then they weren't true friends to begin with. If it will make you happier, then do it.
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it is very difficult in my opinion to live entirely in the closet for all you life.For me it is about honesty and truth.I mean, sooner or later, you have to have real friends, and if you want to have real friends, you have to be honest with them and BE YOURSELF with them!!
As for your family, they don't really have to know, but you would feel really comfortable telling them.But you must consider the consequences first!! -
Live your life and do what you feel is best. There are no rules when it comes to life.
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I think it will be really tough if you tell no one. You should at least have some friends who will know, right? Maybe not now since you're young but later on.
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Dude. Listen to me.
Your parents, and people who really love you, will still love you no matter what.
I'm 22 yo, and I came out to my mom 12 days ago, so it's very fresh into my head.
I was really afraid about her reaction. I had been fighting with my worst fears for many years since I found out that I'm gay.
During the last week before I come out, I was extremely overwhelmed. I was so excited because I was about to tell her the bare truth, but in the same time, I was freaked out. There was one day, that I'd been feeling like I was having a stroke.
There is NO reason to be depressed. My mother is one of those who had been judging gay people, and this is the reason why I was afraid of telling her. Because I had been thinking that she wouldn't accept me, or that she would be extremely sad. None of this happened. She told me that I'm her son, that she loves me no matter what I am, and that she will always support me. Since then, I feel reborn. Previously, I had been feeling like there was a hand which was pressing me to my chest, and that I couldn't breathe, and now I'm extremely relieved!
2 female friends, 1 male cousin, and 1 male friend of mine knew the truth about me, before I come out to my sis, and a week after, to my mother. If you haven't talked to your friends, go ahead and talk to them. Talk to those who can really be trusted. They may be in a better position to advise you and guide you, cuz they know you, and they might know your parents, too.
Stop being self-destructive and unhappy. I wish I had told her earlier. I wouldn't be in that shitty position torturing myself for so many years. I didn't say anything to my father, tho. As long as my mother knows, I'm OK with that. I wish you good luck. -
happiness and unhappiness in adulthood is not simply related to your sexuality, you will suffer kinds of troubles, and then you will find out your sexuality is the not a problem no one care you. if you are less sexual driven it’s better to be closet otherwise to be out. to be a gay have many benefits, so dude just be a happier gay in a closet or outside
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Coming out depends on your culture and where you live.
If you are in America, its no big deal anymore. No one but the haters even cares and luckily, their numbers are shrinking very much. But if you live in Russia or Mongolia or most backwoods third world countries? Definitely think hard and long about it. You don't want to put yourself in danger.
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