SAINT PATRICK'S DAY TROUBLESHOOTING
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SYMPTOM: Drinking fails to satisfy and the front of your shirt is wet.
FAULT: Mouth not open when drinking or glass applied to wrong part of face.SYMPTOM: Feet cold and wet.
FAULT: Glass being held at incorrect angle.SYMPTOM: Feet warm and wet.
FAULT: Improper bladder control.SYMPTOM: Floor blurred.
FAULT: You are looking through bottom of empty glass.SYMPTOM: Floor moving.
FAULT: You are being carried out.SYMPTOM: Everyone looks hideous.
FAULT: Either you haven't had enough to drink, or they've flipped on the lights for last call.
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