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    Do you think that "race" or religion can ruin a relationship

    Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Sex & Relationships
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    • J Offline
      jj1235
      last edited by

      Personally, I find that race won't ruin a relationship provided that both parties fulfil a mutually consensual and intimate relationship. I myself am in an interracial relationship. Some people argue that different people of different races have differing views/education/whatever excuse they can think of. I disagree. It's the 21st century people… Like, hello, people travel, migrate, live, adapt, learn. There's no such thing as monoculturalism these days, unless you don't like living with people who are supposedly "different" than you... Sorry rant over XD Haha but yea, not too sure about religion though.

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      • M Offline
        MikeChang
        last edited by

        As you are saying a Relationship, I'm guessing those obstacles would have already been discussed and crossed before you classed it as a relationship.  So for the 2 people in the relationship there shouldn't be any issues anymore unless one person decided to change their religion or go real hardcore.  However it's the outsiders, be they friends, family or just other people that can cause issues and destroy what you have.  There seems to be this thing with some gay men that makes them want to destroy a relationship just for fun and they will use anything, race, religion, looks, even down to hobbies or what you watch on TV to ruin what you have and split you up.

        So it's down to being a strong couple and having the balls to tell the rest of the world to just Fuck Off and leave you alone.

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        • H Offline
          hhsq
          last edited by

          Is that my perception or people here seem to be a little obsessed with "race"?
          If race is a problem for you in a relationship, then accept that: you are a fucking racist. Period.
          As for religion, which is a COMPLETELY different thing (indeed, I don't know why you are always putting race and religion together, in the same discution… it doesn't make any sense!) it can be problematic depending on the belifs of different partners.
          And to be very frank, one thing I will never understand is a gay christian... but that's ok... that last part is just my oppinion, and I can live with that.

          http://hotgayfuzz.tumblr.com/

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          • BummerBoyB Offline
            BummerBoy
            last edited by

            Race can't but racism can (including unconscious racism and so-called subtle forms of racism)

            If you see a post you like (mine or anyone else's) please show your appreciation and click the 'like' button (˄) below the post that gave you pleasure. It costs you nothing and it spurts a little bit of joy onto the poster's face

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            • M Offline
              Matie
              last edited by

              So you're saying that the only factor in sexual race preferences is racism? Utter BS. You'll be saying that gay men are misogynists next.

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              • andergarciaA Offline
                andergarcia
                last edited by

                Nope. Politics, maybe, but race or religion wouldn't for me.

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                • N Offline
                  nikolaos84
                  last edited by

                  I am secular thinking but recently I was dating a devout Christian. His religious beliefs were so strong that ruined any potential we had as he considered  what we were doing as sinful and unatural. Sometimes he even cried after sex.
                  So yes religion, can cause a drift if someone is very fundamental about it and cannot reconcile his religious beliefs and his attraction to men.

                  As far as race is concerned I don't see any problem, only if there are some racist tendencies in the family or social cycle of the couple. But it is up to the couple to reconcile any differences.

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                  • E Offline
                    eobox91103
                    last edited by

                    @Opiam:

                    Do you think that "race" or religion can ruin a relationship?

                    I think we need to focus the question a bit:  "Can difference in race or religion ruin a relationship?"  It can; it depends on the people involved.

                    As for "race," different ethnicities have different levels of privilege in different societies.  If one person in the relationship is of a privileged race, and the other is in a discriminated-against race, it's possible that one or both parties won't understand the experience of the other–or not be perceived as understanding.  This can cause problems in a relationship.

                    As for religion, most countries (but certainly not all) are tolerant of religious differences.  If the practice of a religion is very important to one party, and not to the other, things can work as long as there's mutual respect.

                    All of this assumes that a relationship has been formed.  Some people will have a "going-in position" that they could not be in relationship with someone of a particular race or religious practice (or non-practice).  That would filter out problems very early on, although if attraction develops after a casual hookup, people may need to revisit their initial judgments.

                    At the risk of going off-topic, it's not unlike a relationship between serodiscordant parties (one HIV+ and one HIV-).  Quite often, an HIV+ person will assume that the HIV- party can't fully understand what it's like to be HIV+, and that can become a problem.  This is becoming less of an issue as HIV treatment advances.  (If you want to address the HIV+/- situation, I suggest starting a new forum topic on that, leaving this thread to the race/religion question.)

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                    • R Offline
                      raju82
                      last edited by

                      I think religion can spoil the relationship especially a gay relationship. Because a few dominant religions have brainwashed the entire population that being gay is unnatural. So a lot of people are confused about their identity and cannot fully commit to it.

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                      • R Offline
                        redzebra02
                        last edited by

                        I don't really get this idea whereby religion/race can RUIN the relationship. If anything, they can be an obstacle to forming a relationship. Once you're in a relationship with someone of different race or religion, I fail to see how either of the two can suddenly become an issue. After all, you had previously noticed the color of your prospective partner's skin and had sufficiently engaged with them to have an idea of their religious, political and other views. If not, you were primarily guided by your dick and never were in a relationship in the first place. But in that case, why blame religion or race when your superficiality is actually the problem.

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                        • R Offline
                          ropula
                          last edited by

                          No.
                            What  ruins a  relationship  is  one  or  both  of the  participants.  They  may  use  race  or  religion as a  pretext, or  they  may  realize  they were racist or  intolerant from the  beginning.

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                          • K Offline
                            Kekkaishi
                            last edited by

                            Not as much as politics

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                            • F Offline
                              fun17
                              last edited by

                              @raju82:

                              I think religion can spoil the relationship especially a gay relationship. Because a few dominant religions have brainwashed the entire population that being gay is unnatural. So a lot of people are confused about their identity and cannot fully commit to it.

                              👼

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                              • K Offline
                                Kekkaishi
                                last edited by

                                @raju82:

                                I think religion can spoil the relationship especially a gay relationship. Because a few dominant religions have brainwashed the entire population that being gay is unnatural. So a lot of people are confused about their identity and cannot fully commit to it.

                                "religions have brainwashed the entire population that being gay is unnatural"
                                I believe a proper term would be "religions have brainwashed the entire population that being gay is WRONG"
                                While I am gay and I don't believe it's wrong, I do believe that being gay is still unnatural (in the literal sense of the word)

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                                • GrotomodeG Offline
                                  Grotomode
                                  last edited by

                                  For me, "race" could never play a role.

                                  I do have a sexual preference towards some "races", which is purely circumstantial and I am sure it would drastically change if I moved to a country with different demographics, but if he is the one that clicks for me then he is the one.

                                  Now in terms of religion, yeah that can be a little tougher to overcome.

                                  Thankfully, all religions have (what some people negatively refer to as) "lukewarm" believers that are level-headed.

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