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    Forget Kansas, like seriously this ain't Kansas any whore!

    Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Jokes & Funny Stuff
    9 Posts 8 Posters 15.2k Views 1 Watching
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    • SemtexS Offline
      Semtex
      last edited by

      my cousin's mom passed away when he was little, leaving my uncle to raise a kid all on his own (which he was not at all prepared for). the two argued all the time and when my cousin turned 18 he just took off. like, fell off the face of the earth for several years. no one knew where he was, just assume he was wandering around the country.

      when he left, my uncle realized that he'd been a shitty parent and started trying to get his life in order. he quit drinking, when to a therapist, and eventually became the person i think he would have been all along if his wife hadn't passed. after a couple years, he met this woman named carrie. he immediately fell in love with her and the two married about a year after they started dating. i was never really a fan of her, but hey if she was making him happy then who am i to judge?

      so it's been about six years since my cousin took off, and out of no where he calls my uncle. the two meet up and after some heartfelt apologies and manly tears, they hug it out. my cousin, who's been god knows where, moves back in with his dad and new step mom. things seemed to be going really well, until she starts acting weird around my my uncle. he feels like somethings up, but really wants to make it work.

      we were on the phone the other day and he's just distraught so i asked him what happened. eventually he's telling me that she's been having an affair, and the fucked up part is it's with my cousin. stunned, i asked him how he found out.

      through the tears he says "i left work early to surprise her, but that's when i walked in the house and saw

      ! CARRIE ON MY WAYWARD SONNNNNNNNNNNN"

      Available for your party

      • Angela Merkel impersonator

      • Bareback Sock Puppet artist

      • Registered Taint Masseuse

      • President of The Mangela Handsbury Fan Club

      • Reformed swallower of swords

      • Retired (for the most part, not accepting new clients) Pimp

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      • A Offline
        AMxb7Izao06c
        last edited by

        Fuck, I might use that in an act

        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
        • A Offline
          akirasano
          last edited by

          😄

          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
          • G Offline
            Gman2034
            last edited by

            😛

            1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
            • C Offline
              cupofass
              last edited by

              :cheesy2:

              1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
              • SemtexS Offline
                Semtex
                last edited by

                @AMxb7Izao06c:

                Fuck, I might use that in an act

                I am down with that unless your act involves Angela Merkel because that is my niche market and riding at the end of the long tail means there taint much to hold on to with my dear life.

                Available for your party

                • Angela Merkel impersonator

                • Bareback Sock Puppet artist

                • Registered Taint Masseuse

                • President of The Mangela Handsbury Fan Club

                • Reformed swallower of swords

                • Retired (for the most part, not accepting new clients) Pimp

                1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                • F Offline
                  famousbovine
                  last edited by

                  Damn, I thought this was true. If it was, there certainly wouldn't be peace when he's done. :clap2:

                  "A witty saying proves nothing."

                  • Voltaire
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                  • J Offline
                    JACK777
                    last edited by

                    😄

                    1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                    • W Offline
                      wesleyrayne
                      last edited by

                      ;D 😄 😄 😄

                      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0

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