The Birdcage - PART III
Albin!
One, two, three and four, five, six, seven and eight.
Again. Three and four ...
.. Five, six, seven and eight.
Spin, three and four.
- Albin! - Hello, my dear ... you came up?
Don't rush me. It's absurd, meaningless.
I look like a square. See how I look.
- You are perfect. - I look like a crow. I look horrible!
- You can see everything. It's ridiculous, Renato. - You look normal.
No, normal is sad and bad when you are well.
- You would me happier with the earrings. - What do you say!
Mother is going away! Here is my Fifi.
- Will you take care of it for me while I'm gone? - Take it with you to England.
They will not let the dog into England. It will not pass the Customs.
- Don't be a fool! - But with the British, what can you expect. - Oh!
My God, sir! Is there a "Carnival"?
- Have you seen? - Jacob, go have a look in the kitchen.
Goodbye, my love. See you soon. I love you so.
I leave it with you.
Fifi, you mother is going away.
It cannot be! Look!
Where are you going, Zaza?
My God! Look at her colour!
Well? No comments. Come on.
- Yes! - Come on.
Hurry, or you'll miss the plane. Do not drag your feet.
I cannot walk without heels. I lose balance.
You will be a notary public in Scotland. The opening of a will.
- You can not go there with heels. - I know, but the socks that I use ...
.. are scratching my pants. Will scratch it! - Look.
On behalf of the party of moral ...
.. I have the honor to preside ...
.. I would like to congratulate you ...
.. to ensure good in your region.
Dad!
- Mom. - Laurent, my child. You see how I'm dressed? - You look beautiful.
- Imagine! - Are you going to Scotland for the inheritance? - Yes
- But I'm dressed for a funeral. - No!
- Sorry, I got work to do. - Give a kiss to your father.
- For God's sake! I would die! - Bye, Mom. Bye, Dad. - Bye.
Come on.
- We are not leaving. - Why? - Come on!
Gentlemen, I am satisfied with this visit to your province.
- Thank you, Mr. President. - Please.
This heritage is important to us.
We are in a financial crisis.
- What does he want? Why does he look at you? - Who?
I see everything! - The man is looking at you.
- Have you noticed? - Looking at me? - Yes!
We have made changes to the place and we are deep in debt.
- This heritage is essential. - He's a sick person? Why doesn't he look at me?
With this suit nobody notices me. I blend in with the walls.
This is the last straw. What an annoying man. Let's move on.
Go ahead. It's a shame you look at persons in this way.
Where did you go to school?
Alright.
- Please, try not to be noticed. - Come on!
- Here we go. I hurt my foot. - How? - My feet hurt.
Bon voyage ...
Yes.
- Mr. - Is it me? - Yes, come here. - Here I am.
- You set off the alarm. - How horrible!
It never happened before.
Empty your pockets.
- This is the first time. You want to see? - Yes - it's my makeup.
- These are elegant for evenings. - You have metal objects on you.
- What? - Metal objects. - Of course.
- I have this case. - Okay. - It's chic.
The lipsticks are carefully chosen. This is delicate.
Perhaps a little strange. You look better with it.
In these beautiful black eyes ... Where did he go?
Well, he "abandoned". And "inconceivable."
He did not even look!
Do I look like a drug dealer? I have a little dust, but it's just dust. It is a catastrophe ...
See you soon, dear!
It is absurd to have such thoughts.
You will tell me that is not important. All rights reserved.
Let's face it, does the same.
SCOTLAND
- Welcome! - Thank you. - Everything is ready for the opening of the will.
The automobile is a veteran car. You're welcome.
Good morning, sir.
Thank you.
Cover yourself, sweetheart. It is a beautiful blanket.
If the map that my colleague provided is correct ...
.. the land of your aunt starts here and reaches to the sea. - Yes
- The sea is far away? - Yes
- Well, it's far. The sea is mine? - No.
- I don't inherit the sea? - No. - No?
Here are your pastures.
Your sheep ...
.. And your sheep.
- The old trees and the loggers. - What beautiful specimen!
About two hundred years.
- The lumberjacks? - Please? - Excuse me, You spoke of trees. - Of course.
I spoke of the woodcutters. A small misunderstanding.
- Here is your castle and your servants. - Splendid! - Well
- What a pleasure! - Good morning. - Congratulations.
So? Yes, thank you.
- Good morning, sir. - Madame.
- Angela. - What a treasure! - Good morning. - Thank you.
- Lory. - How beautiful! - Edwige. - Mr. - They are delicious!
Thank you.
I'm very satisfied. No, over here first.
Oh! Oh!
In the middle of Scotland. Not bad, it's rural.
Yes! No, they all wear kilts.
They are adorable!
You know what? I have an idea for the club.
Make the dance of bees Scottish and put on a show.
No! You are terrible! I don't know what to say.
Do not get mad. Now we can afford it.
Sure! Because I wanted to say something.
I was very sober.
I behaved like a real man. Now let them...
The lawyer is waiting for me Dulac. Yes, but do not worry!
- What happens? - We're proceeding with the opening of the will.
I made a call ... Excuse me.
Please, Mr. Mougeotte. Come in.
This is Kennedy ... the notary
.. And his cousin Mortimer Watson.
Please, gentlemen.
We will now read the will of your aunt, Miss Emma McGovern.
Proceed.
"This is my will."
- "I leave to my grandson, Albin Mougeotte ... " - Here!
"All my possessions, my property Walsy ... "
".. And a package of shares equal to a value of ten million pounds. "
It's almost 25 billions.
"These assets are deposited in the Bank of Berkeley, Aberdeen ... "
".. And the right to the title Duke of Walsy." - Even the Duchess?
"But this grant is subject to a particular term. "
- "If it is not satisfied, the Mr. Albin Mougeotte ... "- It is!
"He will be disinherited in favor of his cousin Mortimer Watson. "
This is the clause.
"The heir, Albin Mougeotte, will marry ... "
".. And have a son from his wife within 18 months from now. "
- Could you repeat that? I do not understand. - I'll summarize. - Excuse me!
- Well .. What he means ... - You must be married.
- Excuse me? - Must be married. - Yes
- With a woman? - Of course! So they need an heir.
Now, Mr. Mougeotte!
Mr. Mougeotte!
Don't!
Mr. Mougeotte!
- Mr. Mougeotte! - I apologize.
- What time is the next plane? - At 5 o'clock. - Yes
Lords.
On! That's it!
- Please. - Yes
- And Mr. Mougeotte! - What did you think?
I think you will soon become very rich.
It's raining! Beautiful Scotland!
- Mr. Mougeotte, I understand your problem. - Ah! My problem!
But for 10 million pounds ... it's worth it ...
But, do things that you do not ...
Can not ..., not for 10 millions?
- You can. - Think it would be foolish, reasonable?
You lie, Dulac. There never was an inheritance.
It is a misunderstanding. Do not talk about it.
- Mr. Mougeotte. - Yes? - Twenty-five billion.
- The good thing is in the plans. - No, it was decided.
Umbrella, and hat storage. My God!
- Renato! - Albin!
Seems like I've been away from you forever.
- How much? - An eternity! - I asked "how much".
- What? - The inheritance ...
You could startby asking ...
.. If I had a good trip, if I liked the shirt.
Okay. You dropped the sweater?
Too late.
What happened in Scotland? I have a right to know.
Not a ray of sun, wind and I hated the plane.
- Now you know everything. - No, you tell me about the inheritance and the money.
- It was a mistake. - How? - Yes, it was a mistake.
WELCOME!
And "grotesque"!
- How grotesque? - Are you coming back!
I want it to stop! I do not want to hear pipers!
And "crazy" too with bagpipes!
Enough!
- Albin. A crowd! - You can not ... It was a mistake!
In those places they make frequent mistakes.
I got down there and the notary was looking for a guy ...
.. a Mr. Alban.
I told him I was Albin and he said, "Not Albin, Alban."
So I said, "Albin Mougeotte" and he said, "Alban Mongeaux."
I told him: "My name is Albin Mougeotte "... and he said:" No, Alban "!
So I told him it was not me.
- What is this? - Nothing!
They are tourist brochures.
All these questions exhausts me. I'm in pieces.
- Lady, you want to put on a sweater? - What a darling! He thinks of me.
- And the inheritance? You brought a lot of money? - Go into the kitchen now!
Now remember, I'm exhausted. You know, they're there ...
I take this ridiculous fantasy, I take a shower and I'll be dead.
Is that clear? I'm dead, dead, dead.
Let me!
You can not have any privacy in this house!
Look for other ways!
Albin , I talked to the bank manager this morning.
Do you know how much we owe? I will not say.
If we fail this inheritance ...
.. it will be a catastrophe. We will be ruined.
- You hurt your eye? - No. - No?
- They form the "Girls"? - Yes! - Are you ready? - Of course.
- Zaza is ready in a minute. - That long!
- Zaza! Zaza! Here I am!
Coming!
- Bravo! - Thank you.
You are good and beautiful.
I think I succeeded. I lost weight.
- Excellent! The life of a wasp. - From the Monkey!
- Let's try to raise her. Armand, are you ready? - Yes
Fasten me well. You are ... You're tickling me!
Come on! Come on!
Come on! - Do not worry.
It works! It's all right. That's funny.
Now you can leave me.
That's funny! I can rest my feet.
- Are you holding? - Yes
"It's funny!"
"See that! Oh, I lost the wig! "
"I can not fly down to the ground. Rub my feet. "
"Maurice!"
Madame Pitipa.
Can I ask you to wait with the cleaning?
"Come on, girls. Bees don't say bff. "
"- What do they say? - They say zzz. "
- When they're upset, they sting. "No. As you said?"
"- Zzzz. - Yes! "
"- Zzzz! - I did it! "
"Come on, guys. With me."
Albin
Together with me! (Together) Zzzz!
"I leave to my grandson, Albin Mougeotte ... "
"My nephew Walsy ..." Disinherited
The bee flew. Bad take-off.
"A package of actions a value ... "
".. The ten million pounds." "I'm dying!"
Ten million! The pound is. .. Multiplied by ten.
- Twenty-five million lire! "Renato!" - I'm going.
"But as a mandatory condition."
"My nephew Albin must marry..."
"... And have a son with his wife within 18 months from now. "
It is not easy.
But, to 25,000 million lire I can do that and more.
- We shall have a child, you can trust me!
Of course!
- Stay back. - Courage! - Renato!
- One, two, three and four. - Renato, I flew!
Renato, it works!
- Renato, where are you? Jacob! - Here I am.
- Take my wings. - You look like an angel.
I am the queen bee and no one understands.
Renato!
Alright.
- I mean, Albin? - Ahh! You scared me.
Why?
- Are you hiding something? - What are you doing in my room?
I ask the questions.
- Do you have something to hide? - No.
- Nothing at all. - Liar.
I can see it in your eyes. You're lying. Tell the truth.
Alright.
I lied.
There's no Alban Mongeaux.
It was just me for the inheritance.
Therefore, we are rich! Sorry, you're rich.
- No. - Why?
Because ...
Because instead of the castle ...
Aunt Emma would .. leave me a hut.
It is a place of two meters.
More like a closet.
It is a kind of "thing" where you put the sheep.
- You know what I mean! - A shed.
Yes, a shed. But it is so bad that it looks like a pigsty.
Yes, put a herd of sheep at the top of the cliff.
I read the will.
Yes
- How do you dare? - Sorry, Albin.
I understand your problem ...
.. But a pigsty with 25,000 million is not an insoluble problem.
Anyone can be put off when asked to produce a simple baby.
But do not worry. I'm here.
- You can count on me. - What do you mean by "simple"?
Nothing, I mean ... You know that.
I had ...
You know. For me, a child is not an impossibility.
No, I never would! And I do not wanna talk about ...
You're doing well. Congratulations!
- What can make a wedding ... And work, how are you? - Very well.
- My father is promoted to managing the press office. - Congratulations!
- It's a job that gives you plenty of satisfaction. - Great!
- I wish I could say the same, but unfortunately ... - I know.
So I came here. I want ...
- Accept it, father. It is a gift to my father. - No.
- I do not accept this gift from my son. - I wanted to buy a car.
I'll stick with the old. But don't buy jewelry for Albin!
I accept it as a loan, and I will pay it back as soon as possible.
Thank you.
Alright. One, two, three or four.
Practical leg up. One, two, leg ...
- I've seen ... - Who? - Laurent. - Laurent!
- You saw your son. You are happy. - No.
- Why? - Look.
- It's a check. - Yes - You asked for some money? - No.
- He gave it to me. - What a treasure!
- He delivered the car. - Poor son! - Yes - poor Dad!
- What do I do with this thing? - I don't know. - It is a drop in the ocean. - Yes
- Not enough for your fantasies. - No trouble! - The furniture?
- It's day. - Went to the hairdresser? - I have the evidence.
- Things are tough! - My job is difficult.
I am an administrator. If you are not satisfied, I'll stop.
- Would you be happy? - Come on!
- You are responsible for home entertainment. - Indeed!
So pay what you must! I must be on the scene.
- You went to the bank? - I do not care about the bank! - Go take a look.
- It's all stopped. Like the Red Sea. - Do not overdo it.
- Push the button. We changed to green. - It's better.
- Green is the color of Scotland. - Repeat. - In Scotland.
- Really Scotland! Stockholders only in equity! - Not true.
I am the only heir! Like I said: Forget it.
- Listen! - I told you I will never accept the inheritance.
- I'd rather die. - Listen, Albin. - I said "no"!
What a mess! You just think about money.
We are in deep shit.
- Think about it, Albin, reflect if you can. - Leave me alone.
- I have to concentrate. - Okay. - Go away!
- Mr. Baldi. - No time. - Please!
Are you listening, Mr. Baldi.
As a representative of the team ...
... I ask for five minutes of your time.
Who said you could sit?
- It is better to sit. - We accept odd hours ...
.. And the work time is not in accordance with the law.
Ah! My God, a tear!
We also accept an infernal pace because there are few days left.
Renato!
- Okay, Renato? - It is very slow.
- You are never pleased! - One thing we do not accept.
- We have not received salaries for four weeks. - That's not true.
We need to eat! So we go on a "hunger strike".
A little "diet" will not hurt.
Why not continue to play basketball?
Caution!
My God! Renato, what did I do!
Mr. Baldi!
Renato! Renato!
Can you see me? Tell me that you're alive!
Where am I?
Madame Pitipa, how are you?
Do you not recognize me anymore! I killed him!
The shock was severe. We will have to take an X-ray of his head.
Of the head!
- Where does it hurt? - In my foot.
Doctor, I am confused!
- I hope the nerve centers were not harmed. - How?
The nerve centers, little.
The nerve centers!
It's nothing.
- Good morning, doctor. - Please have a seat.
Want a recipe for tranquilizers for Albin?
- I came about myself. - You're not well?
No, I'm fine now. But I suffered a severe shock.
A shock can cause serious illness?
Can you give me a severe diagnose in order to impress Albin?
- How? - We have to make Albin believe that I'm dying ...
.. To prevent him from making a mistake. - Why a false diagnosis?
- It's for the good of Albin. - You should tell him ...
.. you will die. She is already upset.
All right, we find something severe and impressive.
You know the worst thing ...
that could happen .. to ALbin? - What?
If you suddenly begin to make love to women.
- Are you tired? - No. - You want to sit? - No, I'm fine.
Your recovery is good. You are great.
Yes, I'm better. I have some concerns ...
- There is something I do not ... - What worries you? I'm here.
I think about everything I ...
.. And you do not ... for business for everything, do not worry.
Oh! Renato, where are you? What happened?
- You know? - No. - Why did you follow? - I do not know.
- Maybe I'm still sick. Come on. - Yes, dear.
Come here, my pet. You will leave with your mother.
A little "air" will do you good. Let's take a walk.
No, Renato. Get some rest. You work very hard.
What are you reading? Oh!
- How terrible! You'll get nightmares. - No! Why?
- What's that smell? Is it you? - Yes
It's my new perfume. You gave it to me.
- "Call exotic". Don't you remember? - No.
- Holy God, don't you like it now! - I don't like it.
- You put on too much, and smell like a man. - In the masculine way?
Yes! I'll tell you.
It is a fragrance for men.
Hold it. I'm going to the washroom. All right, dear?
What are you looking at? What is this?
Where are you?
Excuse me. A beautiful lady should not sweat. Allow me?
- Please? - Help? - Yes, thank you.
- Again! - It is a pleasure. I am at your disposal. - Thank you.
Thank you.
Come to Mama.
You will not do that again, dear. You helped that fat ...
.. And you gave her your address. We will not say anymore, but don't do it again.
Come, I'll buy you an ice cream. You should not do such things!
It could become a habit.
Six, seven and eight.
- Are you feeling well, Mr. Albin? - Five, six, seven and eight.
Not so much, Mrs. Pitipa.
- I am concerned about the health of Renato. - What about Mr. Baldi?
I do not know.
He is not himself. It's so weird!
- I find it strange. - You see?
Nevertheless it is important!
Oh! What is this?
What ... What do you want?
- I came because of your ad. - An ad?
Looking for a dancer.
Oh! Renato, about the ad.
- It's a ... - A woman.
If the show had a woman. She is very beautiful.
- Thank you. - Are you kidding?
There are enough women on the show. What an idea!
You want to overthrow the world?
- Can you speak with a more masculine voice? - I?
A more masculine voice.
- One minute. - I'll be here.
- So we agree. - This worries me a lot.
This means that we are on different planets. I do not know what is wrong ...
.. But nevertheless.
- Hello? - Doctor, it is Albin.
I need to see you urgently. It ...
No, it is urgent. It is not about me. Can you imagine!
About Renato. A few days ago he started worrying me.
I'll explain everything. It is true ...
Excuse me, Doctor, but he does terrible things.
All the time. I can not talk about it now.
Yes! Thank you!
Very good! A hug.
- Hey! - What are you doing?
- I did nothing. I swear. - Enough!
It is the second time in two days. What is this?
I'm leaving. I am a decent woman!
It doesn't matter, my dear.
You will be well.
- He has become normal. - What does that mean?
- It is normal for her. - Interesting. - Yes?
He was reversed and was reinverted. It is a phenomenon of double reversal.
- It is very interesting. - I admit, but I would like to undo it.
A double inversion is not easy to treat.
I have seen "nuts" converted into "bolts".
Shut up!
There must be something to do. An operation ... Treatment.
I'm ready for anything I'll sacrifice anything to save it.
- How much? - Nothing.
I'll review it soon. I'll come back because we are at the beginning of a tragedy.
What the hell!
- Mr. Renato is in the police station. - How? - He's stuck.
- And now. - What's next?
- May I enter? - Of course. - Thank you.
He kissed a traffic cop! I fainted.
I fainted when I heard.
It never happened before ...
.. That's Renato kiss a traffic cop.
You're sick, Renato.
I saw our doctor and he said you are very ill.
It's back to where I started.
I remembered that I had a son. So what did I do wrong?
- What's wrong with kissing a cop? - It's not serious.
The doctor will cure you. We'll go to Lourdes also, if necessary.
I am informed about my case. I'll be a madman.
There could be a solution, but you will not hear it.
- I would do anything. - Speak, my little one.
An operation ...
.. In New York.
Dear! It will cost a lot, I'll stay ...
.. several months in hospital, An operation, but ...
... We can not afford it, Albin! We have no money.
The media! I understand you, I swear.
Thanks, Albin.
- Oops! - It's ... it - is him.
My friend wants to get married. So we come to your agency.
- One of the best. - You're kind.
Our slogan is "if you don't find it here, you don't find it anywhere. "
Tell us a little about you. I want to know your tastes, your character.
- What kind of man are you? - I? - Yes
I need to know to find the ideal woman.
- What is your profession? - The ... - Artist. - Artist.
- Painting? Music? Theatre? - Now I'm doing the queen bee.
- He writes. - Yes - And his latest "work" is called "The life of bees."
Writer.
- Not a writer, an author. - Ah! Serves a nymph Egeria, a muse.
What kind of women do you like?
My taste in women?
- He takes care of that. - No matter the outward appearance.
- Whether it's brown or red. - It does not matter.
Must have a good moral.
- The maternal type. - Sorry, I need to vomit.
- Stay calm. - It is not easy. - How old are you?
- Your age. - Yes - Fifty.
- Fifty? - Forty. - What do you think?
- Thirty-five? - Thirty!
- How big? - Something that is available.
- No matter the size. - Yes, low, high.
Alright.
- The other question. - The demand for reserves!
- Which movie stars do you prefer? - Robert Redford.
Or like Redford.
- Albin, who is the woman? - You-
- The man enters the restaurant, before the woman? - Let's start at the table.
- No, from the entry. - What a torment!
Don't overdo it!
No good, dear?
- What a night! - Albin.
- Yes? - I'm standing. - Sit down. What a bore!
The woman should be seated first. Help the woman to sit.
- Sit down. - Thank you. - Voila!
- Nice women are not like that. - Waiter!
- The gentlemen want something? - Champagne. Kir Royal.
- Champagne and a drop of cassis. - Albin ... - Rather, he needs to know what the woman wants.
Ask the lady what she wants.
- Madame? - Kir champagne.
- Well - We have the same tastes.
- Now, court me. - Excuse me?
- Yes - You want me to court you?
- Yes - In our age!
After 25 years of happiness! Fascinating.
Lovely, but a little ridiculous.
You're right. Lady Roffiani can join.
Lady. You're welcome.
You'll be on your own. Maybe her ...
You're welcome.
Court me.
- Renato, is this a trap? - No, just to put you at ease.
- Take my hand. - Why? Why?
- Why so shy? - I never.
Take the hand.
Not like that! You seem to be holding a dirty handkerchief. With passion.
No. Get out. Look at me.
- Lady. - Is it?
- What beautiful hands! The fingers in my opinion ... - Renato.
- Fingers attract kisses. - Renato! - Renato! You upset me.
Renato!
- Ah! Your gaze turns me on. - Renato. - Careful. - Are you feeling well?
I'm just making a statement.
- How far do you think you would go? - Come back.
Take her hand.
Go!
Look ...
I already said you ... has an exquisite hand?
- Bravo! Wonderful! - Kiss her hand.
Kiss the hand!
- What is it? - I never would do that. Let me go.
Renato, take this hand of mine.
They have said that the hands and a face of exquisite purity ...
It's easy, huh?
Do you want tea or coffee, madam?
I want nothing.
Jacob.
Give this to Mr. Baldi. He should open it after my death.
- Will you kill yourself again? - What am I do? There is no other way ...
Since I'm here are one, two, three, four ...
This is the last.
It's the last time.
Now I know what I want to commit suicide. I want to die.
- Goodbye, Jacob! - See you later.
Don't you understand what I said? Farewell, I shall die.
I stretch out on the tracks near the bridge.
That's where I'm going to die.
I'll be torn apart by a giant ...
Locomotive ...!
You lose five ostrich feathers every time you fly, Albin.
- Albin! Where are you? - Gone to commit suicide. - Again?
- He left this envelope for you. - Take it.
I need patience!
"I will die, so you can live." My death is your life.
"You can cash out my life insurance."
- Where is she? - She said the rails near the bridge.
Holy Madonna!
- What are you doing? - Do not blame me. I do it for you.
I love you, and this is the best solution. Farewell.
It is an unused railway. A train passes a week.
- What day does the train pass? - I don't know.
- Tuesday. I checked. What day is it today? - It's Tuesday.
- I'll lay down with the ear on the rail. - Get up.
Oh! Here you are.
- What are you doing? - Do not insist. I don't serve any purpose.
The only way to save you is my life insurance.
It will take care of you. Lead a normal life ...
... and I'll fade away with dignity.
Cut in two ...
.. But happy!
- Well, Albin. Goodbye. - No! Where are you going?
- I'll tend to things at home. Compose the funeral. - Renato!
- Albin, no more faking! - Let me.
You think this is funny.
I'll tell the whole truth. I lied.
- I didn't convert to a heterosexual. - What?
I wanted to force you to get married because of the inheritance. - Albin!
Are you angry with me?
Tell me what I did.
Leave me alone! Sometimes you behave like a demented.
- What do you mean? - That you're acting like a madman.
- I'll hit you on your head. So!
- Renato! - My God! - No!
- Is he dead? - I hope not!
- You killed him, Renato. - It's your fault. Only your.
- What are you doing, honey? - Are you hurt?
Who, me? I'm fine!
I just destroyed the motorcycle, I I was left by the man I love ...
And now ...
I am expecting a baby ...!
Better than that?
- Good morning. - Good morning. - You recognized me? - Of course.
- To apologize for the accident yesterday. - Thank you. Are they for me?
Yes. Can I talk to you?
- Yes. - You have a small problem.
- And I'm here to help. - Don't talk about it.
- I'm sorry that I got involved with him. - I have a proposal to make.
- Cindy, where are the leg-warmers? - On the shelf.
- I do not understand. - The proposal is very serious. A Duchess ...
.. 25 billion shares if I make a father of his son? - Are you kidding!
- No. - I do not believe in fairy tales.
The offer is very tempting. You must marry the queen bee.
- How? - This evening at La Cage Aux Folles.
You will find your future husband.
Ok!
How beautiful it is to fly from flower to flower!
Now here, now there. What bliss!
Dragonfly on the lawn should be happy in love between roses and lilac ...
... among the lilacs .. and!
- Mom. - Laurent, what a pleasant surprise!
Is something wrong?
My boss had to resign because of me.
Why?
"La Cage Aux Folles" authorized. Party by the moral order. "
- "The president supports a transvestite cabaret "-. My God!
- Remember the check I gave to my father? - Yes - It was issued by Charrier.
Dad paid the bill with it and the press found out.
- These are the results. - My God! - Charrier is destroyed.
He cries and do not want to see anyone.
- Not even his wife. - Didn't bring you any luck.
A pig! Doing this to me!
God! Embarassing me so!
I do not have the courage to resign. What a heartbreak!
Those two ignoble beings I will destroy ...
.. that disgusting beehive of "queers"!
- Shame! - Simon, calm down. - No!
- Mr. Baldi? - Yes
Let me introduce Mortimer Watson.
And the cousin of your companion. Now we understand character of Mr. Mougeotte.
- Well? - We doubt that he can have children. We can make an offer.
We divide the inheritance.
We do not share.
If there was a bigger problem ... But this is not a problem for Albin.
Thank you.
- How are you? - Well - Having fun? - Very.
This is your future husband.
And "He is the queen?"
Yes, "he is the queen."
This will not be tolerated!
I will destroy you. Now you will see how this story ends.
If you think I'm a good man, you're wrong. You do not know who you're dealing with!
Disgusting! Revolting! This time I ...
- How embarrassing! - Shut up! - Calm down. - Shut up!
I came here to settle the score ...
... With the owners of this infamous joint who ruined my career.
They destroyed my life.
But now they will pay me. I'll start with you!
- Help! - Start the flight of the queen.
- Faster! - Ahh!
Allow me.
Ahh!
Voila!
Ahh!
Alright. Bravo!
A round of applause to President Charrier For his debut.
Who from today will become a part of La Cage Aux Folles.
- Stand up! - Bravo!
- Bravissimo! - Raise!
I'll take that.
- Bravo! - Thank you!
Bravo!
- Bravissimo! - And I?
- Doctor, is he injured? - No. It is just the usual.
- Thank goodness! - Now, he is calmed down.
- He has had a severe shock. - I had never had a shooting at a premiere.
- He had a lucky escape. - An ugly escape.
- Go visit him. Goodbye. - Goodbye.
How are you, Albin?
Albin, let's talk.
How are you?
How should I be?
He destroyed my wig.
It was horrible. But what a victory, huh?!
- For me or for Charrier? - For you!
Charrier, however, also did well. I have an idea.
Put him on the show, as the hunter who shoots the queen bee.
Charrier in the show?
- With empty cartridges. - Why?
- It's more fun the way it was. - Do not be a drama queen.
It's okay with everyone else, and the audience was so enthusiastic.
- We'll be at war, Renato? - No.
You have been reformed. I did that tonight.
I nearly died under enemy fire.
Caused damage to the other medals.
Applaud my murder.
The past is past. Let's think about the future.
- Get off my feet! - You have to marry the girl ...
.. she was there. We applauded. - Applauded.
I just escaped death ...
... and now have to think of marriage, because of the inheritance?
It is important but there are two of us.
What matters most ...
.. is our affection. - Ah! Life is not just poetry.
What fo you prefer instead of your heart, sir?
- The cash register? - Albin! - Do not say anything. Do not talk ...
- Silence. - I said nothing. - You were about to say something.
Let me. I'm going to my destination.
- Do not move. - Who moved? - It feet like you wanted to follow me.
Goodbye. I'm leaving.
You pimp!
I want to cry.
I wanna cry!
I was happy with it. I knew nothing.
Then I found out he was married ...
.. And I continued.
Did you love him?
Do you still love him?
No.
I think not.
I don't know. Maybe.
- Thank you.
I'm not married. I swear!
I am ... almost.
I'm epecting a baby. I want to keep it, and it needs a father.
I am very lucky! I arrive in France, fall in love ...
.. And there is no future.
No. There is not.
- Can I see you again? Please. - It is very complicated.
All monsters.
- All monsters and selfish. - Men are all alike.
We are young and innocent, and they took advantage.
My God, how stupid I was!
He said: "I go to work, darling." He was returning from his wife.
- I believed him for a year. - I for 30 years.
For 30 years I believed that man who lived with me, loved me.
For 30 years I believed that ours was a love story ...
.. Tenderness.
Instead, it was all about money.
- How I loved him! - Excuse me.
Excuse me, dear. If you knew how much I love ...
All the best ... Sorry.
Do not cry! If you cry, I cry too.
- What will I do now? - And I?
- I can not live with a man. - I don't.
But we didn't marry.
Yes
Is this fair?
Thank you for accompanying me.
- It is dangerous for a woman to walk alone at night. - Try to rest.
- Good night.
I will not go alone.
I never want to see or talk to him.
- Come up with me. - I do not know if this is the case. - Yes
Come on, please.
See? He was not here to welcome me.
He sleeps.
I spent the night out and he sleeps.
Yes
He doesn't care about me ... He shows indifference.
Do not be sad. Why not go to bed?
In the past he would have searched all police stations.
- Put on a night cream? - Yes
But first I must remove this makeup. I have the strength to do it. Don't.
He would not have returned without having found me.
Never, ever. Thank you, dear.
My God! I have a guy who ...
Not clean!
You will need a washing machine.
Married life is fun.
We remove make-up together in borrowed clothes.
- We have the same size. - Almost. Maybe I'm slimmer.
- Do you sleep with false eyelashes?
No.
That's it.
Now you can undress. I will not look.
Come. I'm ready!
Now what do I do? Should I speak to him or not?
Decide tomorrow.
Good evening, Albin.
I love him so much, Cindy.
Hi! What are you doing here?
I spent som e time with my future husband.
- Enjoy your meal. - Thank you.
Good day.
Hello, Albin. Did you sleep well?
I saw Cindy coming out of your room. It was weird.
If you came to play The Sorcerer's Apprentice, you will be punished.
I want an independent match.
- There may even be some surprises. - Like what?
You will not often be asked to the couple's home.
- And will do well not to come to Scotland. - Very good.
- I said what I had to say. - Now I'm talking about us!
You don't need me anymore and throws me out like an old shoe.
No. I do not speak to disturb you, but I regret it.
- I regret that. - Your creature rebelled ...
.. Dr. Frankenstein.
Albin! Wait for me. Where are you going so fast?
- To a shopping mall. - Why shopping? We have everything at home. We need nothing.
But this is not my house. Now I have to care for a child.
Renato, hold this? There is no child inside.
Indeed. You still have eight months.
- I have a car seat here in eight months. - Take it home!
- You drive me crazy! - You don't know what rasing a child involves.
- You have elastic diapers? - Yes
- I also want to choose a maternity dress. - How big?
My!
What a little fool! Dear, she asked for the size! One second!
I will ...
Walk on the sidewalk ... with this empty cart!
I'm upset. Go ahead.
- Go ahead. - Get out! What agony!
Mr. Baldi!
- Sit down. - Fast. I have little time and many concerns.
- I want you to find another woman for Albin. - Why?
- Because she interests me. - For your information, she also interests Albin.
To find another girl. will be difficult.
To find another single mother who wants to become a duchess.
Listen to me. It makes no difference to Albin.
It's harder than you think.
To annoy me Albin clung to Cindy.
He will marry her, to punish me.
Cindy! Come, my dear.
I'm making a sweater.
- I do not want to get married. And the child? - Will you leave me with the baby?
- It is because of your cousin. - What about Mortimer?
- I'm in love with him. - Oh!
I know that this is not the time. I'm ruining everything!
I almost hurt myself with the needle.
I lost the habit. I'm training with the bottle.
So it should be fine. Don't be sad. Think of the wedding dress.
Come to the City. You will not regret.
It is the right thing to do ... Renato!
Want to try, dear?
It's hot! I did not look, and instead ...
Where are you going?
You won. Get married and be happy.
I will not make any problems. Goodbye.
- What day is it today? - It's Tuesday. - The Train! Jacob!
Call a taxi! Hold the bottle. I knew it!
Thank you.
How lovely it is. What a beautiful day!
Go away, Albin. I want to die alone.
20 years ago I tried to end it like this, but it never happened. And now ...
... you don't impress me, my little one. - Wrong.
I will not move until it passes the train. I do not want to live.
I realized something. You're the only thing that I love.
And when I lost my love, life has no meaning anymore. It is better to die.
Goodbye! Place a flower of the bride in my grave.
My son!
Do you? How happy I am!
Do you?
- What are you doing? - Die with you.
How wonderful! Finally.
It is the best solution.
- It's the train? - Yes, You are on time.
We do not have the air of Coglioncini ...
.. a stand-in in the play of Romeo and Juliet. - Lend me your pillow.
- Mine is a little hard. - I'm serious.
If you promise not to marry, we all go back to how it was before, and go home.
Renato, I wanna hold your hand ...
.. When the train passes over us ... - Are you stupid! We will not be here.
- Until the end! - It was blackmail!
It was exposed, sir. I'll marry her.
If you want a small part of the inheritance, be my witness against Mortimer.
- Where will you take me? Blackmail! I don't like that. - What blackmail?
- You fled. - This time I forgive you.
Please.
- Where is the groom? - I do not know. He is late.
Why doesn't he come?
- Usually it is the bride who is late. - I have other weddings to perform.
If he doesn't comes in 5 min, I have to move on.
There he is!
- It's fabulous! - It's great.
Cuckoo! I'm here! I decided I could not wear a suit.
For some time I wanted to wear a wedding dress.
- Funny! But where's the groom? - There is no longer a husband.
There is no marriage!
Just us.
- So, what do I do? - There is only one solution.
- You still want to marry Cindy? - Yes - I'll make you an offer.
Albin definitely renounces the inheritance of the aunt in your favor and you split it in half.
- And you get to marry Cindy. - I'm happy.
- Is it time to announce a wedding. - Very Well
Once again you surprised me! You've found the solution.
You're a real devil, with horns!
Mr. Mayor, we're going on a honeymoon.
- Ask me the question. - What? - "Miss Zaza, ..."
"... give me your hand?" - No!
- Miss Zaza, give me your hand? - Brava, lady! Brava!