<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF-8"?><rss xmlns:dc="http://purl.org/dc/elements/1.1/" xmlns:content="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/content/" xmlns:atom="http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom" version="2.0"><channel><title><![CDATA[Computer doctor]]></title><description><![CDATA[<p dir="auto">One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike behind him, 'My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I'd better see a doctor.'<br />
'Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money,' Mike replies.<br />
'There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what 's wrong and what to do about it.<br />
It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars . . . A lot cheaper than a doctor.'<br />
So, Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Wal-Mart.<br />
He deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits.<br />
Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout:<br />
'You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity It will improve in two weeks. Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart.'<br />
That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Joe began wondering if the computer could be fooled.<br />
He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample for good measure.<br />
Joe hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results. He deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results.<br />
The computer prints the following:<br />
1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9)<br />
2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7)<br />
3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.<br />
4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.<br />
5. If you don't stop masturbating, your elbow will never get better!<br />
Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart.</p>
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