For me, life out of the closet is way better than life in it. That's not to say I haven't had my fair share of hard times because of people's reactions, but I learned quickly the best way to deal with them and for me, the positives far outweigh the negatives.

I was afraid of doing much anything to show how I was attracted to men before I came out, and then afterward it just felt like fuck it. I got into feeling more relaxed than ever just working myself into this effeminate role, which actually made me a lot more comfortable in the bedroom. Previously I was a lot more nervous about being a bottom, I had played with toys for ages and enjoyed it immensely, but after everything I just found myself feeling as comfortable as could be drooling over a man's cock and didn't get so paranoid about making any noise during sex. Beforehand I felt like I had to hold in any sort of noise so I didn't just sound weird, and now I just feel fine squealing a bit if I feel like it as I don't feel like it makes me less of a person now.

Though I suppose I did have this short period of wondering if I was just acting like a bottom in the bedroom because I had this image of being gay as meaning you just took dicks in the ass, but that sort of concern pretty much vanished after like a week and finally feeling comfy getting laid with whoever resulting in me getting split open by a couple hot guys that took away any fantasies I had that I might ever be interested in topping.

Or are things just different because of expectations you have built up in your own mind haven't quite worked out the way you planned?