How do you double the value of a Skoda?
Chuck a pound into it.
How can you tell that your Skoda has been broken into?
There's nothing missing.

How can you make policemen laugh?
Tell them your Skoda just got stolen.

What do you call a Skoda with a sun roof ?
A skip!

Why does a Skoda have a double rear window heater ?
To keep everyones hands warm when they are pushing it !
Whats the difference between a Jehova Witness and a Skoda?
You can shut the door on a Jehova Witness!