"Can I have one, Dad?"

"Can your dk touch your ahole?"

"No."

"Then you can't have one." The dad took out a cigarette.

"Dad, can I smoke one, too?"

"Can your dk touch your ahole?"

"No."

"Then you can't have one."

On the way back, the dad bought two lottery tickets, one for his son and one for him. The dad won two dollars and the son won $500. The dad was surprised and a bit jealous.

"You're going to share that with me, aren't you, son?"

"Can your dk touch your ahole?"

"Yes."

"Then go f**k yourself."