<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF-8"?><rss xmlns:dc="http://purl.org/dc/elements/1.1/" xmlns:content="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/content/" xmlns:atom="http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom" version="2.0"><channel><title><![CDATA[THE REASON WHY I FIRED MY SECRETARY]]></title><description><![CDATA[<p dir="auto">Two weeks ago was my forty-fifth birthday, and I wasn't feeling too hot that morning anyway. I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and say “Happy Birthday,” and probably have a present for me.<br />
She didn't even say “Good Morning,” alone any “Happy Birthday.” I thought, “Well, that's wives for you. Maybe the children will remember.”<br />
The children came in to breakfast and didn't say a word.<br />
When I started to the office I was feeling pretty low and despondent. As I walked into my office, my secretary, Janet, said, “Good morning boss, Happy Birthday.” And I felt a little better; someone had remembered.<br />
I worked until noon. Then Janet knocked on my door and said, “You know, it's such a beautiful day outside and it's your birthday, let's go to lunch, just you and me.” I said, “By George, that's the best thing I've heard all day. Let's go.”<br />
We went to lunch. We didn't go where we normally go; we went out into the country to a little private place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously.<br />
On the way back to the office, she said, “You know, it's such a beautiful day. We don't need to go back to the office, do we?” I said, “No, I guess not.” She said, “Let's go to my apartment.” After arriving at her apartment she said, “Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'll go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable.”<br />
“Sure,” I excitedly replied. She went into the bedroom and, in about six minutes, she came out carrying a big birthday cake, followed by my wife, children and dozens of our friends. All were singing “Happy Birthday” and there on the couch I sat… naked.</p>
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